In order to know your truth, you have to analyze what in your life feels right and in line with your authentic self, and what does not (what you do out of feelings of obligation or fear).
In hopes of inspiring you to recognize your fears and limiting beliefs, here is an exercise that I use in many of my workshops and with private clients (and I even do it myself every couple months). Knowledge and desire to change what is not working in your life is the first step to creating a life you LOVE where fear informs but does not dominate. With this exercise, you are actually stockpiling an inventory of fearlessness!
So I challenge you to bust out of your comfort zone and actually DO this exercise!
- Draw a line down the center of a sheet of paper.
- On the top of left side of the line, write, “What Do I Want More Of In My Life?”
Then write the following categories leaving some space between each to fill in what you want more of:
- Health & Wellness
- On the top of the right hand column, write, “What Do I Want Less Of In My Life?”
Then write the same categories leaving some space between each to fill in what you want less of:
- Health & Wellness
Take some time to fill out each category. When you are finished, tear the paper along the centerline, safely burn the “Want Less” list, releasing its energy from your life, and hang the “Want More” list where you can see it on a daily basis.
- Write “Kicking the Crap Out of My Mafia Mind” across the top of the page.
I refer to the fear mind as your mafia mind because just as the mafia extorts money for “protection,” your fear mind behaves the EXACT same way by extorting the joy from your life by threatening you with what may happen.
- Throughout the day, police your mind for deep-down limiting beliefs (downloaded blueprints) that get in the way of what you are creating. Write them down.
- Create a counter statement to each of the limiting statements. These will help form your affirmations.
Limiting belief: I am bad with money.
Counter statement: My abundance flows with ease and every day I become more masterful at effectively handling my finances.
Every day, answer the following questions:
1. What daily actions can I take to support creating my dream life?
Examples of Positive Daily Actions:
Eat lots of fruits and veggies
Take a five-minute break every three hours to sit and take deep breaths
2. What is today’s mantra (i.e. today’s motto / mission statement)?
Example: All good things come to me.
3. How do I feel today?
4. What courageous action can I take today to bring me out of fear and into freedom?
5. What am I grateful for today?
Once you have completed page one, do a Fearless Journaling Exercise to dig deeper.
1. What Do You Really Want?
Based on the Fearless Inventory, write the story of how your ideal life looks. Be specific.
- You want to work how many hours per week? What does your office look like? What type of people are your co-workers?
- What does your relationship look like? How do you want to handle conflict? What do you do to keep the relationship alive?
- Where do you want to live? What does your living space look like?
- What do you want to do for fun/balance? Any new hobbies you want to explore or old ones you would like to start up again?
- Do you want to travel? Where?
2. What Is Getting In The Way?
Without judging or blaming, list the TOP three things in your life right now that are preventing you from creating the lifestyle you described in #1. (Be specific and provide as much detail as possible.)
My two parting thoughts…
When you are confronted with a choice, no matter how small or insignificant, ACT AS IF YOU HAVE A PREFERENCE!
Psychologists say that we are born with only two FEARS:
- LOUD NOISES
This means that every other fear is LEARNED. Therefore, it can be UN-LEARNED!
This weekend, allow yourself the time and space to put thoughts into words (which makes you more accountable and therefore more likely to act upon them). Living the life you deserve that is in line with your truth is worth the time and effort. Once you have completed the exercise, refer back to it and update your progress. Seeing how far you’ve come will motivate you to keep going!
I am interested to hear how this exercise goes for you. Were you surprised by your responses? Did you find it empowering to put your thoughts down on paper and does it inspire you to create an action plan? Are there areas in which you still feel stuck and need guidance? If so, share your thoughts or questions right here and get support from our Positively Positive community and yours truly.
Terri Cole, founder and CEO of Live Fearless and Free, is a licensed psychotherapist, transformation coach, and an expert at turning fear into freedom. Recently, Terri released her first CD “Meditation Transformation.” She is writing her first solo book “Flip Over and Float—Transform Fear into Freedom in 6 Simple Steps for Sustainable Change” and co-hosting Live Your Truth Love Your Life with yoga psychologist Ashley Turner. Terri is set to appear in Lifetime Network’s new show “The Conversation.” Terri can be found on her website, Facebook, and Twitter.
* Photo by Lauren Lionheart