Several years ago, I was asked to help with the grand opening of a major health club in Boulder, CO. I was hired as the Mind & Body Coordinator. It was a beautiful 40,000 square-foot facility. I was honored to be a candidate for the position.
I had dreams for the club. I had visions for where I wanted to take yoga and Pilates on and off the mat in the city of Boulder. And so, after only a few short months, I had over seventy classes on my schedule and over thirty employees.
The programs ROCKED, if I do say so myself.
We were on the map. Every teacher wanted a class there. Every student wanted to practice there.
I had to give myself a pat on the back. I had done well. Life was good. I was happy.
But after a few years, my vision of how the program was going to develop began to differ from corporate. I did not want to settle for anything less than the best.
Always the entrepreneur, I had my designs in action. I saw teacher trainings in our future. I saw products aligned with our simple, green holistic lifestyle on our shelves. I saw workshops by celebrity teachers near or far in our studio every month.
But I felt stuck. I was being fought every step of the way.
I knew it was time to move on, but I was scared to make a change.
My position had become my identity. The club had become my life.
I was paralyzed by fear. How would I reinvent myself as myself rather than as the position I had been holding? How could I make my dreams a reality?
One evening, after teaching one of my classes, my boss called me into her office and asked me to step down as manager. Just like that. I couldn’t believe it.
Apparently my visions were too big. They needed to keep it simple. Perhaps they, too, were scared of what I could become.
I felt like my life had just toppled out from underneath me. I didn’t know what to say. I was paralyzed. Devastated. Surely my life was spinning out of control. How would I ever move forward?
It took a few moments, but I finally took a breath. And suddenly, I realized what I needed to say: Thank you.
Thank you for the opportunity of a lifetime.
Thank you for the gift of freedom.
Thank you for letting me go so I can reach out of my comfort zone and fly.
Life is fraught with unpredictability. At the drop of a hat, disaster can strike. Everyone encounters death, heartbreak, devastating illnesses, job instability, and financial crisis. Perhaps it’s a personal situation that arises and then knocks you down. Maybe it’s the stress of your job that keeps you up too late at night.
Whatever it may be, we all experience the whirlwind of unpredictability at times. And when it happens, you may feel:
A Total Mess
Like a Failure
And when our lives feel like they are spinning out of control, it’s not always easy to look at what may be secretly appearing on the brighter side. It’s difficult to feel hope or see the bigger picture.
And no matter how tough you are, it is very easy to feel vulnerable, confused, or lost.
When things go amiss, it is challenging to feel anything but the mass of heaviness on your shoulders with no peephole to help you see the light of day.
But when you’re down and life seems like it’s giving you a kick in the gut, please remember these four things:
- Everything happens for a reason. Nothing has meaning besides the meaning you choose to give it. It’s up to you to make each incident empowering or disempowering. And it’s up to you to find the lesson in everything. For instance, if I didn’t step down from my management position at the club, I would not be where I am with my business today. Living my dream.
- Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional. You don’t have to suffer. It’s definitely a choice. Nothing lasts forever, including the pain you are in. So, experience it. Live in that moment. But then get out of the story you’re starting to create. There does not need to be any mental drama around it (i.e. “I will never find a job again.”)
- As one of my mentors, Marie Forleo, says, “Make ISness your business.” Live in the current moment and know that’s the only moment you need to handle. Give it your full attention. It’s your reality. And when that moment is over, move to the next moment. Are you still breathing? Of course you are. Then, fabulous, you’ve just handled that moment. Are you ready for the next one that will bring you one step closer to engaging in your life again?
- Take one day at a time. I know it sounds like a cliché, but it’s TRUE! Eat nourishing food. Exercise. Spend time with your friends. Do what has to be done TODAY—not tomorrow, not next week. I promise you that if you live one day at a time, you will secretly find yourself moving on!
Have you ever felt shattered or lost or had a problem getting back on track? What did you do to help you get out of your rut? I’d love to hear from you, so please leave your comments below.
Hayley Hobson is an author, speaker, business coach, yogi, Pilates instructor, and holistic nutritional expert based in Boulder, CO. Her unique and intelligent style promotes strengthening while softening—empowering her clients to heal not only their physical bodies but their hearts and minds as well. To learn more about her nutritional courses, events, and custom programs, visit hayleyhobson.com or follow her on Facebook or Twitter.