The Single Woman Says: One of the best times for figuring out who you are and what you really want out of life? Right after a break-up.

They say there’s a thin line between love and hate—well, I say there’s a thin line between joy and heartbreak.

Any time something so earth shattering in your life happens that it breaks your heart, it also leaves the doorway of your soul open to new emotions and new mindsets that can literally shake, rattle, and roll you right up to the next level.

Leaving the comfortable shell of a long-term relationship is one of the scariest things a person can do, but think about it: what would happen to the butterfly if she refused to exit her cocoon? She would never grow, never change, never acquire her wings. If you outgrew a dress, no matter how fabulous it once fit…you wouldn’t keep wearing it, would you? Then why are we so willing to stay stuck in a relationship once it has become clear that the other person is not our perfect fit?

Breakups have a way of shaking us awake and helping us see what we really want versus what we are willing to settle for. There will come a day when you will look back and thank God that this person or opportunity was removed from your life, because you would have never found YOU if you hadn’t lost THEM.

Realize that everything and everyone that walks away from you does so because they are no longer a part of your story. Be thankful that they were a part of your life—but be just as thankful to tell them bye. Nothing is as powerful a motivator as coming face to face with goodbye. And nothing is as beautiful as the girl who, with a broken wing, still flies.

If you are currently going through a heartbreak or a break-up or a transition from two birds of a feather to flying solo, there IS happiness on the other side of goodbye. That’s what the sad movies and songs forget to tell you.

After the pain comes the rain…and after the rain…comes the sun! And before you know it, everything’s coming up daisies again.

The funny thing about endings is that you will never have an ending that is not immediately followed by a new beginning. Isn’t that a wonderful thought? Think about it. At every juncture in life…when one thing ends, another begins…and we often enter our new beginning through a door that we never could have pushed open as long as our hands were still filled with yesterday!

Remember: on the other side of that broken heart is a brand new start. Right now, this very moment, is a defining moment in your life, so face it, embrace it…and watch your wounds turn into wisdom…and your trials turn into treasure.

*Excerpt from The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass


Mandy Hale is affectionately known around the world as “The Single Woman.” With a heart to inspire single women to live their best lives and to never, ever settle, Mandy cuts to the heart of the matter with her inspirational, straight-talking, witty, and often wildly humorous take on life and love. She’s also not afraid to talk about the many realities of being single in a world that still asks, “And WHY are you still single?” Mandy was invited by Oprah in 2012 to cover her Lifeclass: the Tour events in St. Louis and New York City and has been named a “Twitter Powerhouse” by The Huffington Post. Her first published book, The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass, is now available.