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I’m told happiness is a choice.

Unfortunately we complicate our lives to the point of being unable to recognize happiness when it appears before our eyes.

So how to clear the slate? Here are ten things you’ll need to give up in exchange for your happiness.

1.  Give up caring what other people think of you. I know it seems counter intuitive as we humans are primal pack animals that don’t want to be cast from the village; but spending time worrying what others think, is a waste of energy. You’ll never please everyone and it’s none of your business what others think of you.

2. Give up trying to please everyone. Unless you’re living life to the beat of your own drum, your tribe won’t be able to find you. Be the best version of YOU you can be, and you’ll naturally attract in the people that are supposed to surround you.

3. Give up participating in gossip. 100% of the time, those sharing gossip with you will gossip about you. Believing gossip is like gambling everything on a horse sight unseen. It’s naive.

4. Quit worrying. Where thoughts go, energy flows. Worry is investing time and energy in something you don’t want to have happen. Learn to let go and trust.

5. Let go of insecurity. When we take ourselves too seriously, we think everyone else does too. There is one version of you on the planet. Be it, own it and quit worrying about it. No one really cares or watches you that closely.

6. Stop taking everything personally. Truth is, most people are too consumed with their own life to really consider what you’re doing. As my first boss said so well: “the world doesn’t revolve around you. Most people’s reactions have nothing to do with you, so let it go.”

7. Give up the past. We’ve all been hurt, we all had parents that made mistakes and we’ve all been through hell. You didn’t listen to your parents when you were younger, so why are you still listening to their voices in your head right now? Every experience in life has taught you something or made you stronger.

8. Give up spending money on what you don’t need in effort to buy happiness. Living simply allows the space for life to flow. We complicate our lives by spending too much money and filling our home with “things.” Less is truly more.

9. Give up anger. Anger burns a hole in the hand of the person still holding on to it. Move it out once and for all.

10. Give up control. Control is an illusion, as we live in an out of control world. Learn to let go.

Learn to embrace the new and welcome change; otherwise you’ll grow old through your own rigidity. @dailytransform (Click to Tweet!)


Tamara Star believes happiness is not an end destination, but instead the ability to see the ordinary through eyes of wonder. She’s an international best selling author, life coach, and the creator of the original 40-day Personal reboot program for women–a 6 week virtual deep dive into clearing the slate on what’s blocking you from living a life you love. Her first book, a quick and easy read: “How to Survive a Break Up and Come out Thriving,” is available on Amazon. Her co-authored book “Sexy Secrets to a Juicy Love Life” sits on the International Best Sellers List. You can find more information on dailytransformations.com and follow her on FB or Twitter.

Image courtesy of Melvin Quaresma.