I’m pretty sure there’s something in your life, right now, that you need to give up. Let it go. End it.

I can think of a few things that I need to let go, too.

But too often I’ve relied on Give Up thinking to justify thoughts like, “Ohh, sweet Mother of Relief! So it’s cool if I skip exercising again – for the 37th week in a row? Phew!”

We sometimes use Give Up thinking to justify easing away from the very things we should be striding towards.

Instead of being thoughtful and selective about what we’re giving up and WHY, we often pull the Give Up card the minute things get tough. Too quick on the draw.

Giving up the dream of living in a palatial mansion or deciding to quit an unhealthy relationship might be some of the kindest decisions you can make for yourself and the people around you.

Those are probably healthy, soul-justified Give Up decisions.

But don’t corrupt the Give Up mantra into a lazy cop out.

If you have a track record of slipping out the back door the minute there’s a little heat in the kitchen, I’ve got some tough love for you (which really means, I’m saying this to myself first + foremost):

Put your whining in perspective.

Mothers push trucks out of the way to save their babies.
Firefighters walk into burning buildings to pull strangers from the smoke.
There are places in the world where children are accustomed to eating once every three days – at best.

And you can’t bring yourself to take the dog for a proper walk?

Separating the recycling from the regular garbage is too much of an agony for ya?

Instead of dwelling on why you want to say No now, ask yourself why you said Yes then.

What made you fall in love with your work? Your spouse? Your kid? Your pet? Your neighborhood?

Put your finger on the enthusiasm that made your skin tingle way back when. Marinate in that.

Bring that passion into this moment right now and let it decide how you proceed. Whatever is driving you to Give Up might become a tiny speck when you hold it up against the light of that original Love.

And if you’re rationalizing giving up because you’ve been ‘holding the vision’ of this person or this job or this experience for months now and the fact that it hasn’t arrived must be proof it’s not meant to be…

Visualizations alone are good for your blood pressure, but not much else.

The Law of Attraction preacher who told you that mental exercises were all that’s required to build the life of your dreams has essentially sent you out into the wilderness with an empty water bottle. It’s such a lovely bottle, but it’s useless without the wet stuff inside.

Yes, of course, state your intentions. Write them on your bathroom mirror. Tell your friends what you’re doing. Meditate on the vision of that future reality as often as possible. Absolutely, yes.

But in between the affirmations and chanting, you have to take ACTION.

Make the call. Send the email. Go to two more networking events this month. Ask for the help you need. Pay for the support you don’t have. This is what hustling for your dreams looks like.

If you’re about to give up on something because chanting and meditations didn’t manifest it for you, visualize this:

*I have just grabbed you by the shoulders and am shaking you violently with every word: YOU CAN DO THIS.

Dream and move at the same time. @annikamartins (Click to Tweet!)

Of course, there are times when giving up is the way to go. If that’s where you are, quit it hard and quit it strong. I’m writing Part II about this necessary type of giving up, next month.

A true Give Up decision is clear and grounded. Even if it requires difficult conversations or disappointing the ones we love, the appropriateness of that decision will ring high and clear in your heart.

But if your Give Up feeling is fuzzy and awkward and can’t sit down comfortably… that’s probably not a genuine call to let something go. That sounds like a corrupted Give Up. That sounds like fear of the necessary hard work of creating the life you’ve been dreaming of.

And Mr. Fear is not to be trusted.

Love,
Annika


Annika Martins is a spiritual curator, which is kinda like being a museum curator. Except instead of curating paintings, she curates spiritual practices. Like art, meditation, dance + self-touch (oh yah). She’s bringing together her favorite spiritual seekers for a one-of-a-kind spiritual conference/ sacred party event and she wants to jam-jam with you there!

See the Sacred. Your way. It’s all going down at AnnikaMartins.com.

Image courtesy Quinn Dombrowski.