I try to see failure as a necessary aspect of success. @gretchenrubin (Click to Tweet!)

Which is easier said than done.

For instance, I often remind myself to Enjoy the fun of failure. This catchphrase has made a huge difference to me. I’m very ambitious and want to succeed at everything I try, and that makes me very anxious—which isn’t a creative frame of mind.

Telling myself that I can enjoy the “fun of failure” has made me (somewhat) more light-hearted about taking risks. As G. K. Chesterton wrote, “If a thing is worth doing, it is worth doing badly.”

I also tell myself, “If I’m not failing, I’m not trying hard enough.”

I want to see failure as a necessary and acceptable part of a fun, ambitious, creative career. As an Upholder, that can be tough, because when I set out to do something, I really want to met that expectation for myself. So I try to expand my expectations for myself to include failure, as odd as that sounds.

Someone once said to me, “Don’t call it failure! Re-frame it!” At first, I thought that sounded like a good idea, then I realized — no. I don’t want to pretend a failure away; I don’t want to gild it up; I want to acknowledge and even welcome failure.

How about you? How do you think about failure? Can you stretch your definition of success to include failure, so that you can succeed by failing?


Gretchen Rubin is the author of the #1 New York Times Bestseller The Happiness Project—an account of the year she spent test-driving the wisdom of the ages, current scientific studies, and lessons from popular culture about how to be happier—and the recently released Happier at Home. On her popular blog, The Happiness Project, she reports on her daily adventures in the pursuit of happiness. For more doses of happiness and other happenings, follow Gretchen on Facebook and Twitter.

Would you like to learn more about habits — and how to make or break them? Read my book, Better Than Before. It turns out that it’s not as hard as you think to master your habits, once you know what to do. Intrigued? Read an excerpt of Better Than Before.  Olisten to a clip from the audio-book (yes, that’s me, reading). Pre-order here.

Image courtesy of Quinn Dombrowski.