In the field of pure potentiality everything is possible, yes? I think so. Actually, it’s the thinking part that makes it so. We’ve heard that before. But what really is this thing called potentiality? Is it some pipe dream? Some fantasy we concoct in our minds? Or is potentiality, pure and simple, our inborn ability to create our lives and be who we’re meant to be?

I know, it sounds so elusive. Who can really do this? Is it magic, like pulling a rabbit out of a hat? Well, who’s got time for that? Fooling around for what, so I can just be disappointed? I’ll never be Mark Zuckerberg, or Meryl Streep, or you fill in the blank with the person you most admire. And here’s why. Therein lies your clue and your truth. Lies your truth. Had to write that again. I grew up hearing from my parents, my Mom especially, that I could be anything I wanted to be. That’s what any loving parent says to their child. But the deeper underlying message is that you can be who you are, and by looking at those you look up to the most you’ll get a major glimpse into your own gifts and possibilities. In psychology that’s called positive projection.

I grew up gay. Trust me when I tell you I COULD NOT BE who I really was.

I had to lie my way around the first twenty some years of my life filled with a boat load of shame and tons of judgment heaped on me from my culture and me. Aren’t we all are own toughest critic or worst enemy as the case may be? Growing up gay sucked a lot of the time, but when it didn’t it forced me to think outside the box because God knows I didn’t fit into any of the pre-made boxes already out there. I definitely didn’t fit into the heterosexual box, the traditional boy box, the dating the opposite sex box, or the typical play sports in high school box. I was gay. I studied theater, liked boys, and danced ballet. You get the picture.

Being who I was would take me a lifetime of work to uncover. I’m fifty now, insert gasp of disbelief, and finally getting the hang of being me, and feeling safe enough to express myself. Writing is a perfect example. I could write when I was younger, but so much of my self was hidden it didn’t make for a lot of specifics, and writing requires the details, and almost all of them. I marvel at younger writers like Amy Schumer who seem to so easily flash their authenticity at us with such creative flare it takes my breath away. And Amy is just one example of many artists that do this via whatever medium they’re using to express themselves.

But potential is pure. There’s nothing we can do about it. It’s in us like our soul. Well, actually it is our soul. We’ve been sent here to do something on this planet, in this incarnation. We’re here to make a difference, whatever that looks like.  So what does it look like for you? For me, it looks like getting naked with everyone. I know, it’s a little creepy at first read, but think about it. To the degree I can allow myself to open up is the degree to which you, as the reader, get to know me. It’s also reflective of the degree to which I know myself. And probably correlates to the degree of happiness in my own life.

Being me is freeing, as is being you is freeing for you. @barryaldenclark (Click to Tweet!)

This has nothing to do with taking our clothes off, though that can be fun in the right setting.

You are, and I am, pure potential. And then sh*t gets in the way. F*ck. Yeah, this little overstuffed arrangement of negative thinking pisses me off. Like if you don’t stop talking sh*t about yourself I will punch you – pissed off.  Seriously, come on, stop it. Who taught you to be so nasty to yourself? Oh, wait, I know, because I’ve done it to myself for-EVER! Enough is enough. Like Barbra and Donna,” I can’t go on, I can’t go on no more, no.” Now I know I just lost my younger readers, because, let’s face it, most of you reading this are younger, so in the words of my favorite super hero siblings The Wonder Twins, “Millennials activate! Form of a Google search engine. Search: famous singing duo of the seventies #enoughisenough.” And we’re back.

The recording of judgments and negative self-talk got implanted long ago in my world, easily drowning out the more subtle, but no less real and present, authentic voice inside myself directing me towards my destiny. So how did I end up in Hoboken?!?! No offense New Jersey. Hoboken is beautiful these days, it’s just an old phrase. How the hell did I become this person working in a job that no longer works for me? How did I end up dating a man I loved dearly for almost a full year before discovering he was married to another man? Yeah, I know, that one’s rich.  But I digress. How did I end up living in Long Beach when my whole life all I’ve ever wanted was to be working in the creative fields of television, film, theater and publishing?

Sh*t happens, and one day you wake up to realize you’re not living up to your full and pure potential. That’s usually right after people realize they’ve been drinking margaritas daily for weeks on end, are twenty-five pounds overweight, have no money in savings, have no boyfriend, or that the requisition for blood work was issued a year and a half ago and they haven’t gone in for the tests nor seen their doctor in all that time. Don’t look at me, I don’t know who this person is.

Be who you are. Be who you’re meant to be. Live your potential now. You are pure potential. And don’t let anyone EVER tell you you’re anything other than all that. You’re a child of God, created in God’s image. That means you are divine. And with a little faith, you can move mountains. You don’t have to, of course, move a literal mountain, but you could or you might and that would be wonderful.

Move. Be you. Let your true colors come shining through. Thanks, Cyndi. We love you Gaga. And when your thoughts start to go in a downward spiral call on your inner diva, whomever he is. Grow some balls if you need to, just make sure you don’t let your thinking make the worst of you. Wrangle your thoughts back to their bully pen and shut the gate. Then set your unicorn and fairies free to fly all over the place sh*tting joy-filled positive thoughts all over your inner landscape. Buy into yourself and your abilities hook line and sinker. Believe in yourself, in your ability to do whatever’s in your heart. You can and you will. Cause I said so. Make it so Number One. That’s you.  You make it so by your thoughts. Think positive. Speak positively. Act positive. And eventually your life starts to look positive. This stuff works.

If you walked into my house you’d be bombarded with the most positive affirmations, images, music, and art.  Everywhere you walk in my home you’re told what a wonderful person you are, because you are. You’re told just how much potential you have, because you do. And you’re told how lovable you are because you are. I know a lot of folks think this is bull crap. But if you watch the news, read the newspaper and hang out with your office coffee clutch I can guarantee you’ll have as many if not more, negative words, images and feelings thrown at you. Choose your surroundings carefully. We are responsible whether we like to admit it or not, for what we put in our mouths and in our minds.

Negativity infects our spirit and pulls us down and away from our potential. It makes us think and act like we’re never going to get a promotion, a new boyfriend, and especially not that condo we really want to buy in Palm Springs. Well, f*ck that. I’m going for my own personal gold. I’m going to win in the world I’m weaving with my thoughts, my words and my actions. I’m co-creating with my creator, you fill in the blank, and together, like Mary Tyler Moore, we’re gonna make it after all.


Barry Alden Clark has coached thousands of individuals in connecting more deeply with their hearts, their life purpose, and helped create a pathway for these folks to move forward in a direction more aligned with who they truly are. He & his creative partner Eliza Swords are currently delivering uplifting content on social media every Wednesday via “Best Day Ever with Barry and Eliza”, a Facebook and You-Tube phenomenon reaching thousands of people around the world. They are also inspiring love and joy through creating heartfelt and entertaining content via their production company Pure Honey Ink. Currently they have projects in development for social media, film, television and publishing. You can reach Barry at www.barryaldenclark.com.

Image courtesy of unsplash.com.