January Is the Dreaming Month. Take the Pressure off to Figure It All out, and Try This Instead.
“How you start your year is how you will live your year.”
You can start your year following conventional wisdom which says things like: make a New Year Resolution (you know will fizzle out by March), figure out your goals now, lose twenty pounds so you can fit into a bathing suit, and hit the ground running when you go back to work.
Exhale. Can you feel the pressure and stress that starting your year that way would create?
As an MBA, Type A, I used to be a woman who would make a resolution on January 1st and map out her goals by Jan 10th, put them in a spreadsheet or on a vision board and then drive towards them all year. My husband Noah was the opposite, he avoided setting goals all together. Perhaps he was waiting for the ‘goal making fairy’ to show up and make things happen. Neither strategy worked.
I tried to do too much and created a year in which I felt pressured to push hard and keep it all going, leaving little time for play, rest or what brought me joy. As a result, I created a year that drained me instead of sustained me. Noah avoided the questions of what he really desired, and created a year in which he felt unfulfilled and without direction.
Then I got wise. I realized that the ‘s.m.a.r.t. goal,’ resolution-making approach I had learned in my corporate training and conventional world upbringing had taken me as far as it could. I realized this truth:
If we want to create lives in which we thrive instead of just survive and strive, we must change HOW we design our year from the start.
So I began exploring ‘wisdom traditions’ like indigenous earth wisdom, divine feminine wisdom and the yogic traditions, and I hit the jackpot!
All of these traditions pointed to consistent pieces of wisdom about how to vision, create and design your new year, which I share with you below, as an invitation to start this year differently.
Imagine creating a year in which you have what you need to go for your dreams and take care of what you love, without having to sacrifice your personal health and happiness.
I have used these myself for over a decade, and taught them to many others, and while I am still a work in progress in creating a reality that sustains instead of drains me, the dreams I have brought into form, and the imprint I have had on the world, and the amount of space I have for myself has multiplied exponentially.
Wisdom #1: January is the “Dreaming Month” – Start Your Year in Spaciousness + Create More Spaciousness All Year
In the earth wisdom tradition they teach us to move in harmony with the natural cycles of the earth vs. human made timelines. For example, January 1st has no innate significance. In nature, January in the Northern Hemisphere is winter, the plants are dormant, animals are still. It’s the time to listen, to imagine, to expand into the possibility instead of trying to ‘figure it all out’ or ‘nail down a plan’. Wisdom in fact requires a pause, a slower pace, to emerge and reveal itself. So we take January to dream and listen at a slower pace, and then around February 2nd we claim our intentions just like planting seeds in the ground to grow the coming year.
What if you started this year in spaciousness by giving yourself permission to dream and design the coming year for all of January?
Wisdom #2: Create from Your Desires Instead of the Shoulds
There are lots of ways you could spend your life force – time, energy, money and love – this year. Left to your mind’s intelligence more often than not you will choose the things you think you should do or have to do vs. what you really desire to do.
I love the word DESIRE. It is defined as “a longing or craving for something that brings satisfaction or enjoyment.” The root of the word comes from the phrase de sidere meaning “from the stars.”
I think of creating from your desires like creating from your heart in co-creation with the Universe – and that can only be good! Way more exciting than anything our little brains could whip up. Our brain will always choose what feels safe, our heart will keep us safe but will always lead us to possibilities that create more of what we truly desire.
Action: Have a heart-to-heart with yourself this January to reveal your true desires for 2017. Your heart will reveal your true desires, if you ask! Write out the following inquires, and then journal, meditate, or talk with friends about them to reveal what really matters to you this year:
What is one project that has nothing to do with being productive or profitable that I would LOVE to do this year?
What would I LOVE to receive this year? From my work? From my relationships?
What would I LOVE to give my energy and time to this year in my work?
What relationships would I LOVE to grow this year?
What would I LOVE to do for myself this year?
If I could order up a delivery to receive special support from the Universe, something that I would LOVE to happen but I have no idea how it would happen, what would I ask for?
Give yourself the space to imagine and expand what is possible for your life, work, relationships, and health and wealth this year.
Start in spaciousness and expanded possibility + live that way all of 2017! @ChristineArylo (Click to Tweet!)
Christine Arylo, m.b.a., is an inspirational catalyst, transformational teacher and best-selling self-love author who teaches people how to put their most important partnership first, the one with themselves, so that they can create the life their souls crave. The popular author of the go-to book on relationships Choosing ME before WE and the self-love handbook, Madly in Love with ME, the Daring Adventure to Becoming Your Own Best Friend, and her newest Reform Your Inner Mean Girl. She’s affectionately known as the “Queen of Self-Love” for her groundbreaking work in self-love, including founding the international day of self-love on Feb 13th. Arylo is the co-founder of the self-love and empowerment school for women, Inner Mean Girl Reform School. You can follow here on Twitter, FB or visit her sites here & here.January 17, 2017