I was the sort of child that teachers credited with having a “good imagination”. This was seen as a positive when it came to creative work, less of one when I stared out of windows, forgetting to listen to a word they’d said. Getting lost in daydreams is still one of my favourite things to do, but just like in school this is both a good and a bad thing.

A dreamy personality certainly isn’t unusual. Part of being a human is the ability to imagine and create, whether it’s visualising a fantasy home or writing an epic novel. Life would lack sparkle without daydreams, and these aimless musings can sow the seeds of a grand idea or major life change.

To stop daydreaming would be a bit of a tragedy, and curbing your imagination when it’s rushing off in positive directions would be a self-sabotaging act. But this doesn’t mean that our creativity isn’t ever a source of trouble. I’ve found over the years that there can be some downsides to being a daydreamer.

Retreating into my imagination can be an inventive, productive activity that sparks new ideas and prompts change. Sometimes it’s simply pleasant way to pass the time. Yet it isn’t always this way, and there are times where daydreaming has inhibited my life rather than complemented it.

The Fear of Missing Out.

A huge part of this is the Fear of Missing Out, a phenomenon that’s become so widely experienced as to deserve an acronym, FOMO.

The fear of missing out is caused by many factors in modern life. For example, consuming the curated feeds of social media friends in which everyone seems to be having a more enjoyable, meaningful or successful time than us.

Combined with the frustration of being constantly presented with aspirational imagery through advertising and the media, it’s easy to become dissatisfied with the way things are. I personally wasted far too much of my early twenties thinking there was something better going on elsewhere.

Daydreaming meant that even in the times where (if I’d bothered to notice) everything was going well, I was imagining an alternative – and superior – life which made reality seem gray and uninspiring.

Reality Vs Illusion

Real life rarely lives up to idealised narratives we construct over many dreamy hours. You could be on an all-expenses paid holiday on a paradise island and still encounter moments which are boring or uncomfortable. But on the other hand, this experience could offer amazing, real-life things that you wouldn’t have imagined.

This means no matter how developed your imagination is, the life you are actually leading needs to take priority.

This is something that daydreamers can forget, and I’ve definitely been guilty of not appreciating some brilliant moments because they didn’t look exactly how I imagined them.

Imagined Disasters

This isn’t the only way my reveries can cause problems. Ironically, while I was constantly nurturing the idea that reality simply wasn’t cutting it, by imagining various worst-case scenarios I wouldn’t take any of the risks needed to make a change and achieve the alternative life I envisaged.

Avoiding social situations with new people, ducking out of a presentation, being reluctant to show people my work – this was all the result of mulling over exactly how embarrassing these scenarios could be if x, y or z should happen.

This put me off making any kind of decisions where the outcome was uncertain. While we can imagine grand plans and how, if we just took the plunge, how life could change in really positive ways, we are also very skilled at conjuring up the imagined downfalls which hold us back.

Furthermore, sometimes I had so fully realised an idea in my own mind that I didn’t take any steps to bring it into the real world, out of a fear that it wouldn’t live up to expectation. This kind of thinking was very limiting, and something I had to take steps to unlearn.

Using Our Imaginations Constructively

Of course, not all daydreaming needs to be useful in some way, and at times it’s nothing more than an enjoyable escape. But if you are beset by FOMO or find yourself mulling over some very negative (but unlikely) fantasy scenarios, there’s way to channel your imagination more beneficially.

The first thing to do is objectively assess your life and all the good things in it. The second is to remember that while social media feeds can give the impression of an exciting, fulfilling life, there isn’t a human on earth who doesn’t experience plenty of mundane moments. Learning to appreciate what you have turns daydreaming into a motivating force, rather than a source of discontentment.

You can also stop focusing on negative ideas by making some changes. Taking up meditation boosts your creativity and confidence, and lessens the stress which exacerbates anxious thoughts. Another thing to do is recognise when your thoughts are turning in an unpleasant direction and deliberately distract yourself – perhaps by going for a run or picking up a book.

Our imaginations should expand our horizons and enrich our lives. @bugeyedcreature (Click to Tweet!)

By tackling some of the problems with day dreaming there’s no reason why they shouldn’t.

Have you ever found that your expectations and reality are disconnected? Comment below!

Holly Ashby is a writer and illustrator who’s interested in creativity and wellbeing. She currently works for Will Williams Meditation, a London meditation centre that aims to help people achieve health and happiness through Vedic meditation. You can find Holly on Twitter.

Image courtesy of ecowa.