“Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.” – Judy Garland
March is Women’s History Month, a time to celebrate the diverse and historic accomplishments of women. It is my busiest time of the year; as I’m blessed to travel around the country to speak on women’s issues and empowerment.
My favorite part of speaking to women is feeling the phenomenal energy that is created when we come together. Anyone who has ever been in a room where women with a similar purpose are gathered knows what I’m talking about! From coordinating transformational events to launching companies that are changing the world, what women are contributing is indeed historical.
But another thing women have a history of doing when we come together is engaging in comparison. The most common confession I hear from women is that they are consistently trying to measure up to other women – be it their friends, colleagues, family members, celebrities or the societal pressure to “have it all.” Women are far more likely than men to leave an event that is intended to be inspirational feeling deflated because there was someone there who they judged as better in some way.
Let’s make this comparison habit history! It is time to UPdate the way we see ourselves by looking at our own unique skills, gifts, beauty and intelligence. Imagine how much more powerful we will be as we appreciate ourselves more!
There is plenty of abundance to go around so:
And if there is a woman whom you measure yourself up against, can you transform the comparison to inspiration? I guarantee you that whatever qualities you admire in her, you have in you – they just may be expressed in a different way.
Here is a writing exercise that can support you in this transformation:
Imagine the woman you compare yourself to, let’s say her name is Sally, and complete these stem sentences, “Dear Sally, when I look at you I see…. When I look at you I feel…. You create…” After you complete your writing, go back and take Sally’s name out and turn this positive projection on yourself! In other words, replace “you, yourself, and she” with “I, myself and me!” You’ll realize that the things Sally has or does are also inside of you.
When you start to appreciate yourself more there will be no need to play the lose-lose game of comparison! Today I invite you to call up at least three women in your life and acknowledge them for what they contribute to your life. And really listen when they acknowledge you in return – because a woman rarely hears a compliment without offering one back.
“Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.” – Unknown
Christine Hassler has broken down the complex and overwhelming experience of recovering from disappointment into a step-by-step treatment plan in her new book Expectation Hangover. This book reveals the formula for how to process disappointment on the emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual levels to immediately ease suffering. Instead of wallowing in regret, self-recrimination, or anger, we can see these experiences as catalysts for profound transformation and doorways that open to possibility. You can find more info on her website, and follow her on Twitter and FB.
Image Courtesy of xegxef.