Why can’t I articulate what I want?

First of all, you were never taught. It’s way easier for your parents and you if you don’t dream big. Then you won’t be disappointed, frustrated or hurt.



We still get disappointed, frustrated and hurt because it’s our birthright and our natural tendency to dream for our lives. @HGLifeCoaching (Click to Tweet!)

Most of us did it as kids, unabashedly, and it was fun to do it.

Now we live in a “default mission,” or what we call an “adjusted life.” A life of what we can settle for instead of what we really want.

Well, that’s just another way of saying “we sold out.” So we MUST begin dreaming again. Here are some rules to follow:

First of all, it has to be juicy and sensory. No brochure language or clichés.

BAD: I’m bringing home the bacon.
BETTER: I confidently charge what I am worth and receive it with gratitude.

Second of all, it has to be positive. No sneaking in secret jabs at yourself or your past.

BAD: I live without fear of judgment.
BETTER: I consult my own opinion first.

Thirdly, it has to be a stretch, but doable. No pie in the sky grandiosity or your subconscious will never get on board.

BAD: I wake up every day 100% vibrantly alive.
BETTER: I feel vibrant.

Lastly, it has to be stated or written in the present tense. Yes, you have to feel it like it is happening right NOW! The energy released when you read it puts you in the right space to attract, notice and get the results you want.

BAD: I would be happy in my marriage and connected to my husband.
BETTER: I am happy in my marriage and connected to my husband.

Try writing yours now and make sure to follow these rules. If you still find that your sentences are lame or uninspired, here are two questions you can ask yourself about the sentence(s) you wrote:

1) What do I really mean by that?
2) Why do I really care about this?

This is HEART work. These questions will help you get to the heart of the matter for YOU.


As Co-President and Senior Coach at Handel Group® Life Coaching, Laurie Gerber’s professional and personal mission is to better the world by teaching people to tell the truth and pursue their dreams. Her focus is on maximizing clients’ ability to thrive across all areas of life–health, love, career, money, family, etc. Laurie spreads her message of empowerment through live international events, one-on-one coaching, virtual coaching courses, as a writer, and in TV and radio appearances.  Follow Laurie on Facebook and Twitter.

If you’re ready to say what you want out loud and then make a plan to go for it, our Design Your Life Weekend held in cities nationwide, will show you exactly what to do to reach your dream.

*Image courtesy of The Handel Group®