We all go through pain in our lives and usually we go through pain many times. Pain is uncomfortable, it is scary and we all try to avoid it. And I am not talking about physical pain here, but rather Emotional and Mental pain.

This past weekend my husband, daughter and I traveled to the East Coast to visit a very special friend who is losing her battle with a very serious brain tumor.

It has been very tough just finding out about it and was really difficult seeing her in person as I was overwhelmed with emotion. Inside I was on fire, I was burning with raw emotion and wanting to explode with grief, sadness and despair. We’re so young! We have families! Why was this happening?

I wasn’t sure how I was going to be at the end of the weekend, if I was feeling like this now.

The funny thing is, the whole experience completely shifted my perspective. As time went by, an increasing amount of peace, love, gratitude and acceptance started to come over me. Just sitting there, being present, enjoying the moments for what they were, talking and sharing love, completely sucked the negativity and pain out of me.

I learned right there that it is in these moments of intense pain and despair that we can actually see the truth. We so often try to avoid the pain because it is so uncomfortable for us humans. So we try keep it bottled up, we try avoid it, we try fight it and ignore it.

When really we shouldn’t. We should just let that emotion come out and the energy pass. When we do that, there is almost always a wave of peace and knowledge that flows in behind it.

We need to discover how we can use Pain to help us reveal the beauty in life.
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For us to acknowledge and become aware of all the “small“ gifts that are in front of us, every single day, but we tend to miss out on them because life is happening around us and distracting us.

On the one morning my husband and I went for a walk in Duke University gardens and it was just such a powerful experience. The lasting impact of the previous day still echoed loud within me. The walk seemed so much more beautiful, the gardens were alive and prettier, even though it is approaching Winter, I appreciated my husband’s company that little bit more, life just seemed so much more of a gift.

Those feelings were so powerful and yet so peaceful.

I was in a state of gratitude for our friendship, for the simple conversations, for just being in each others company, for everything that I did and for everything that happened.

So whatever pain you are going through now, I encourage you to use it as trigger to a more positive state.

Allow the negative energy to flow out, don’t hold onto it. That negative energy is powerful and needs to release. If you keep it within, it will just bounce around internally causing havoc and chaos and even more pain.

Let it go.

When you do, it will be a followed by peace. Use that to appreciate everything in your life, from the absolute smallest things to the biggest. You’ll find that when you are in that state, the smallest things are actually the biggest things…a simple smile, a little flower, being in a loved ones company etc.

We have to use pain to allow us to remember to see the beauty and gift that is life, rather than allowing that Pain to consume us and steal us away from the gift of life.

Have a wonderful and safe holiday!


Hayley Hobson is an author, speaker, business coach, yogi, Pilates instructor, and holistic nutritional expert based in Boulder, CO. Her unique and intelligent style promotes strengthening while softening—empowering her clients to heal not only their physical bodies but their hearts and minds as well. To learn more about her nutritional courses, events, and custom programs, visit hayleyhobson.com or follow her on Facebook or Twitter.