Do you ever feel like your dreams are taking a really long time to come true? The career you want has not happened despite your efforts. The relationship you desire has not manifested even though you have feng shuied your house and have done Calling in “The One”. The debt you have been chipping away at still may take years to be gone. The health condition you have been healing still lingers.
And often it is not just our dreams or goals that seem to take their sweet time. It is also those pesky patterns and limiting beliefs that we invest lots of time and money in shifting that seem to keep showing up. You are frustrated that your inner critic still has a major role in your life or that your insecurities still block you from taking risks.
You are taking action. You are setting intentions. You are doing the work. So why the heck is it taking so long????
Good question. And there are multiple answers.
First I want you to know that you are not alone. When we feel a longing for a goal or a change, the time it takes to actually happen is impossible to predict or 100% control. Of course this is incredibly frustrating especially when we feel like we are doing all the right things.
Here are five keys to keep in mind that I hope will ease your frustration a bit:
- We do not have 100% control over our life. We do have control over our choices and how we respond to situations in our life but there is no way we can say we have 100% control because we live in an interdependent world. If you have not noticed, you are not the Master of the Universe. No matter how intentional we are with our goals, there are lots of other variables like other people, your soul’s curriculum (more on that in #3), and a bunch of other stuff that we mortals cannot begin to understand.
- Which brings me to Divine Timing. As much effort as we put into things, there is still a Universal Order that is the master timeline. As ready as you feel for something, trust there is a really good reason as to why it has not happened yet. You may not know that reason now, but trust me, someday you’ll look back and understand.
- You have free will and you have a soul curriculum here on Earth. You have come here to evolve, to grow in consciousness and your Higher Self cares more about your growth than any external goal, dream or change you want to make. Some of the things your mind wants now may not be appropriate as it could interfere with the growth you need. So instead of asking, “why is this taking so long?” Ask, “What am I learning from this time in my life?”
- The above said, sometimes things are taking a long time because you are actually not taking the action that is required to speed them up. Your own fears, excuses, and doubts may be causing a delay. Assess where you are holding back or playing small. Be honest with yourself as to whether you are playing victim. When it comes to shifting patterns and limiting beliefs, do not just process your issues or compulsively do personal growth work. Instead take contrary action, as this is the best way to break patterns and rewire your brain. For example, if you are working to shift the pattern of people pleasing, start saying no and speaking up for yourself.
- You are doing the best you can. Really you are. Of course you can do even better but it is SUPER important to acknowledge how far you have come. If you are only looking at what has not happened, you are missing out on celebrating how much progress you have made.
The more you pay attention to how far you have come, the easier it will be to get where you are going. @ChristinHassler (Click to Tweet!)
It may take another day. It may take another week. It may take another month. And it may take another year (or years). Trust that whatever your “it” is, is coming. You would not feel the longing if it was not.
In the meantime, enjoy the moment. Spend more time in gratitude for what is here right now. Your life and you are a work in progress. There is no “there” so just be right here.
Take a nice deep breath. Everything is on time.
P.S. I have a new podcast where I coach people LIVE on the air. Head over to Over it and On With It and listen in for inspiration and action steps.
Christine Hassler has broken down the complex and overwhelming experience of recovering from disappointment into a step-by-step treatment plan in her new book Expectation Hangover. This book reveals the formula for how to process disappointment on the emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual levels to immediately ease suffering. Instead of wallowing in regret, self-recrimination, or anger, we can see these experiences as catalysts for profound transformation and doorways that open to possibility. You can find more info on her website, and follow her on Twitter and FB.
Image courtesy of: fancycrave1.