Someone once suggested I could start blogging about parenting and ways to raise confident children. “What an exciting topic!” – I was telling myself. I could certainly read lots of parenting books and start writing. But how authentic would that be, considering that I’ve never changed a diaper? I might do parenting coaching someday, but let me be a parent first, so I can understand what that means.
Being authentic is more than walking the talk. It is to stay true to our real feelings, thoughts, and opinions and acting from a place of real power when we know who we are. Authentic people do not put a mask to pretend. They are genuine, unafraid to show vulnerability, and they have no problem to admit they’ve made a mistake. With authentic people, what you see is what you get. No lies, no hidden agenda.
Authentic people are self-confident, so they have a higher ability to deal with problems and to make powerful choices for their highest good. By staying true to themselves, they are happier and less likely to get stressed.
Here are ten good questions that could give you some honest, new insights into how authentic you are in your professional life:
1. Am I trying to become a copy of someone else (a colleague, a manager or a peer)?
2. Are there any situations when I tend to pretend everything is fine, even when it isn’t, for the sake of looking invincible and strong?
3. Am I wearing a mask, so that Me at work and Me at home look like two persons who’ve never met before?
4. Do I have any hidden agendas in relationship to others? Am I pleasing people that could help me advance in my career?
5. Am I saying Yes to things I don’t really feel like doing, just to please others?
6. Am I pretending to agree with someone else’s opinion when, in fact, I don’t?
7. Do I mean what I say and do I say what I mean?
8. How do I stick to my promises and my commitments? Do I do what I said I would do?
9. (For leaders only): Do I lead by example and walk the talk?
And last but not least, and extremely important:
10. Am I choosing to stay in a job I dislike or I don’t believe in? Whose dreams am I building?
If yes is your answer to any of these inquiries, let me tell you I know how that feels; I’ve been there as well. It is frustrating, exhausting and even painful.
But here’s the good news: your dreams are waiting and the sky is the limit, once you believe in yourself. You are a powerful human being and you have the right to create and live a life you love. Authentically, with no apologies and no regrets.
Sara Fabian is a Women’s Empowerment & Career Coach and inspirational speaker, on a mission to help professional women to discover their unique strengths, gifts and talents, boost their confidence, find their calling and live a meaningful life of purpose. For weekly inspiration, subscribe to her free newsletter at www.sarafabiancoaching.com or follow her on Facebook.