My price of admission went up recently.

As it does every time I deepen into my growth and healing. Every time I do the work to raise my self-worth or claim more of what I really want for myself.

My time, attention, and energy become less accessible.
I raise the standards around what I’m willing to tolerate.
I focus my energy on the things that matter most.
And I become even more unapologetic about all of it.

We don’t have to be what other people want us to be, even if we were that person just yesterday or for the last however many years. We’re not obligated to stay the same or stay in the roles and routines that bring comfort to those around us. And we’re certainly not obligated to continue giving our time, energy, or attention to anything that no longer feels aligned.

Yes, people will think you selfish if they haven’t done their growth work and continue to take the things other people do personally. Especially if they don’t feel comfortable with or supportive of change in general.

But that doesn’t make it wrong.

We’re here to be the person we’re meant to be, doing the work we’re here to do. We can’t actualize that without continuous growth and healing. And with life always happening around us, shaping us as it goes, things inevitably change—we inevitably change.

Surrender to the unfolding and stay in growth.
And keep raising your price of admission as you do.

Trust that the right people around you will be supportive, and if not, let them go.

Trust that you’ll be met by new people who understand the process.

Release is essential to growth, healing, and making the impossible happen.

Letting go, cutting ties, and clearing space.

Because often, we can’t step into a new way of being until we’ve fully severed all connections to what came before. Who we were, how we showed up, what we did, who surrounded us, and what we believed.

It’s terrifying and uncomfortable, it can feel isolating and lonely for long periods, and it’s full of unknowns and uncertainty.

And goodness gracious is it hard! Because we’re standing in the middle of our lives—smack in the center of relationships, work, obligations, and communities—trying desperately to start showing up differently and creating new outcomes for ourselves.

It’s hard to step into what’s next when you’re so immersed and enmeshed in what’s been. It’s hard to alter your context and shift into a new paradigm when everything old is still in motion, demanding your attention, and always asking for your time and energy.

So sometimes, you have to cut the cords. As many as possible so you can create the space for what’s next to emerge. So you have room to step into new ways of being. So you’re able to get clarity about what’s next, without being influenced by what was.

It’s not easy, and it’s not always possible to cut every tie. And when it’s not, we have to be even more vigilant about staying rooted in what we want and who we want to become. Holding our vision close to our hearts while committing to continuously act in alignment with the possibility we want—regardless of the circumstances around us. Regardless of the environment around us.

Raising our price of admission every time we level up.
Guarding our time, attention, and energy.
And becoming even more unapologetic about all of it.

But I realized that if I was ever going to truly heal and find a new sense of wholeness… I had to stop pretending that everything was fine.

Nothing was fine… not after everything I’d been through. Not even close.

As I was losing the ground beneath my feet in a way that I’d never experienced before, I had to learn how to ride the waves of grief, every single time they hit me. WITHOUT holding back for the sake of someone else’s comfort. WITHOUT plastering over it with polished positivity. WITHOUT denying any aspect of my experience.

Had I done it any other way, I’m not sure I’d have survived it.

And I certainly wouldn’t be where I am today… happy, aligned, and in love with this little life of mine.


Stephenie Zamora is the author of Unravel and Awesome Life Tips®, a coach and strategist, and founder of Stephenie Zamora Media—a digital media and production company, publishing house, and a full-service life-purpose development, branding, and online marketing boutique. Her company has been merging the worlds of personal development, digital media, and online marketing to help individuals build purpose-driven lives and businesses for nearly a decade. Stephenie’s work helps catalyze individuals on their healing and growth journeys so they can uncover the purpose of their path, step into who they’re here to be, and do the work they’re here to do. She does this through several distinct brand verticals that follow a proven five-phase process and house various digital media content, educational programs, inspirational and motivational products, and services to support their growth at any scale. Learn more at www.StephenieZamora.com, or connect with Stephenie on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube!

Image courtesy of Alexandro David.