When I was in over $20,000 of credit card debt, I spent quite a bit of time beating myself up about it. I wasn’t opening my bills, paying attention to what I spent, or making any progress on the financial front.
“What is wrong with you?” I would ask myself as, month after month, I barely made a dent in the mounting debt.
“Why can’t you get it together?” I would inquire after I’d broken my rule to not use credit cards…again.
I berated myself. I wallowed. I felt mired in shame.
And, despite the cultural programming that had taught me to beat myself up about my mistakes in order to make better decisions in the future, it didn’t work. Beating myself up just made me feel bad. And feeling bad led to more bad decisions.
One day, I was on an airplane from San Diego to New York City, writing in my journal about my financial pickle. As I wrote, I made a connection that was brand new. It felt revolutionary.
I realized that my lack of financial awareness was a result of unconsciously playing small. My chaotic financial life was rooted in a lack of self-love.
I got it that if I could connect loving myself with financial awareness, maybe I could finally pay off my debt and create true financial freedom.
I felt elated to have found the missing piece of my financial puzzle:
All of a sudden, I knew, deep down, on a cellular level, that connecting taking care of my money with loving myself was the missing ingredient.
Have you ever been given the advice to take care of your money as an act of self-love? I never had.
But it was doing just that that changed everything for me. Not long after my airplane aha moment, I was able to pay off all my debt within a matter of a few months, and I also doubled my income, doubled my savings, and fell in love with an incredible guy.
And the best part of it was that the process felt good.
When we make changes from a place of love instead of from a place of beating ourselves up, they stick.
And the process of getting to our desired destination is actually enjoyable instead of a drudgery.
If you currently find yourself in a financial pickle, see where you can add love to the puzzle.
- Can you find compassion for yourself and the choices you made in the past that got you to where you are today?
- Can you find gratitude in your heart for the financial foibles you’ve been through because they’ve taught you invaluable lessons?
- Can you find forgiveness for the people whose decisions affected your financial situation negatively?
When we mix a large dollop of love into our financial lives (or any other part of our lives for that matter) we heal. Love will help you get out of debt faster. Love will help you earn more money. Love will help you become a smart investor and a savvy money manager.
Put down the flail. Stop beating yourself up. And instead, try love.
Purchase Kate’s bestselling book Money: A Love Story TODAY, September 24th,
and get FREE access to her live online event A Course in Having Enough
with guest teachers Marianne Williamson, Barbara Stanny, and Amanda Steinberg.
For details, visit www.moneyalovestory.com.
Kate Northrup is a professional freedom seeker and creative entrepreneur and mentors entrepreneurs in creating their own financial freedom. She created financial freedom for herself at the age of twenty-eight through building a team of more than 1,000 wellness entrepreneurs in the network marketing industry. Her philosophy is that if you free yourself financially, you can be fully present to your purpose on the planet. Find out more and take her free Money Love Quiz to find out what your relationship with money says about you at KateNorthrup.com and follow her on Twitter and Facebook.September 24, 2013