How do you want to be seen by the people you work with, your clients/customers, your friends, your family, your romantic partner, and the world in general? My guess is you’d like to be seen for your gifts, beauty, confidence and contributions. You probably don’t want to be seen for your insecurities, doubts about yourself, or what you deem your weaknesses and imperfections.

We all want to be seen for who we truly are and feel accepted, safe, and acknowledged in the eyes of others. But you can’t expect the world to reflect back to you what you cannot see and acknowledge inside yourself.

In order to receive the acceptance you crave, you have to give it to yourself first. @ChristinHassler (Click to Tweet!)

Today I have an experiential exercise that will support you in doing this, which I’ll teach you by first sharing from my own experience . . .


On the morning of my birthday last week, instead of sitting on my special cushion and doing my usual closed-eye prayer and meditation, I was inwardly guided to sit directly in front of my mirror and look into my own eyes. I’ve done that before but never for as long or as deeply. I began with one of my favorite prayers to the Divine, “Support me in seeing myself the way you see me and seeing others the way you see them.” As I looked into my own eyes, there were first very ego-based thoughts present but once I began to sink into my prayer and look deeper, I experienced an unbelievable amount of compassion and unconditional love for MYSELF. I’m great at holding that space for others and often not as great at holding it for myself consistently (can you relate?).

Sometimes it was tempting to look away, but the more I stayed with myself, the more I began to see through the eyes of my soul. I felt my connection to the Universe and to everyone else. Although I was “alone” there was no loneliness present. And as I continued to look deeper, an overwhelming sense of gratitude for being born and for my human experience was present. My heart opened even more as tears streamed down my face.

To access the part of you that is connected and truly sees you, I suggest doing this process:

• Set up a mirror you can sit very closely in front of.

• Do this process upon waking up when you are your most authentic (primp-free/make-up free/unshaven) self.

• Set a timer for a minimum of ten minutes (give yourself this time!)

• Begin with the prayer, “God (or insert your whatever word resonates with you), help me see myself the way You see me.”

• Softly and gently gaze into your own eyes. When you begin, the voice of your ego may be loud and making comments about your puffy eyes or hair or whatever other self-judgment it hooks you with. Breath deeper, notice the thoughts but don’t let them hook you.

• Despite how uncomfortable it may be or how tempted you are to look away, DON’T abandon yourself! STAY WITH YOURSELF. Things in your life may not be shifting because you leave your true self and go into doubt, fear, judgment and limiting stories.

SEE YOURSELF the way the Universe sees you: as whole, complete, enough, deserving, and absolutely beautiful exactly the way you are. When you ask to see yourself as the Divine sees you, shift happens. And when you look into the eyes of your soul you will see that everything in your life has been perfectly orchestrated to get you to this moment. Experience the gratitude for everything you’ve been through that got you exactly where you need to be.

See yourself the way you want to be seen.



Christine Hassler has broken down the complex and overwhelming experience of recovering from disappointment into a step-by-step treatment plan in her new book Expectation Hangover. This book reveals the formula for how to process disappointment on the emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual levels to immediately ease suffering. Instead of wallowing in regret, self-recrimination, or anger, we can see these experiences as catalysts for profound transformation and doorways that open to possibility. You can find more info on her website, and follow her on Twitter and FB.

Image courtesy of Timbo84.