Here we are in the last month of the year.

Whether you celebrate the holiday season or not, you cannot help but notice they are happening around you.

For many of us who do celebrate, we see family and friends we don’t often see throughout the year.

This can bring up a lot of JOY and a lot of PAIN too.

You may have people in your family who struggle in their life which provokes a deep desire for you to help them change.

I know how tempting it is to want to control people, change people, save people and wake people up.

In truth, saving others is not our job. Not even with family members.

What is our job is to hold loving space for them. To stay neutral and grounded and send them and show them love.

That is the best gift you can give them and yourself.

I’ve learned this myself the hard way and no matter how seductive it is to want to “go in” and try to rescue, it’s my experience, it does not work.

Every one of us has our own path and while it’s true that children and the elderly are dependent on others, our roles even with them is to guide and support.

Guiding and supporting are not the same as controlling.

It’s not our job to bring people on board with what we believe is right for them.

I’ve learned that if I can’t relate to how someone is living, I can still find some common ground by looking for the good in them and in our relationship.

I believe that there is a holy purpose for all relationships.

When you connect with your heart, you find more ease in any situation and you can help others who are struggling just by being love. @laurafenamore (Click to Tweet!)

It takes patience and practice to begin to follow your inner guidance and “let go” when you see others who are struggling.

So no matter what you have planned for the remainder of this year, when you find yourself with family members, friends or loved ones who are struggling, hold an intention for them that is bigger than they may see – and enjoy your time with them.

I would love to hear how you do with this.

Please share in the comments below how you show up and serve others without trying to control or save them.

Happy Holidays and Much Love to you all!!!

Laura Fenamore, Body Image Expert, Coach and acclaimed Author is on a mission to help women around the world end the constant battle with their bodies and start adoring who they see in the mirror. Her approach walks students and readers through the heartfelt journey to self-love at any size or age by unlocking the secrets to a lifetime of emotional, physical and spiritual health. After overcoming a lifelong battle with addiction, obesity, and eating disorders, Laura released 100 pounds – keeping it off for more than 28 years. She chronicles this journey to self-love and health in her widely acclaimed book, Skinny, Fat, Perfect: Love Who You See in the Mirror. Learn more about Laura’s programs, or invite her to speak by visiting

Image courtesy of Alisa Anton.